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1/2 lb. ground beef
    (for a lil-ass dick)
up to 3 lb. ground beef
    (for a big ol' whopper of a dick)
onions (as desired), chopped
peppers (as desired), chopped
1 large pkg. egg noodles
    (yeah that's right fucking eggs in your noodles you uncultured piece of shit)
1 can cream of mushroom soup
    (you're probably gonna make your own if you know what i'm saying)
1 can whole kernel corn, drained
    (fucking drain that shit you dumb cracker)
2 or 3 cans tomato sauce
    (honestly, one is plenty, but it's your dick;
smother it in tomato sauce all you want, pervert)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
    (when your oven is ready, it'll beep, you dumbass)
Rub beef til it's good and wet
    (don't act like you don't know how to rub some beef)
Add onions and peppers.
    (they help cover up the smell of your foul cock, you bum)
Cook noodles according to package directions.
    (fucking boil them until they're soft, you lazy turd)
    (the noodles, numbnuts)
Add remaining ingredients; pour into a casserole dish.
    (don't hump it yet, you animal)
Top with grated cheese.
    (jesus h christ thank God for cheese)
Cook until bubbly and cheese is melted.
    (oh fuck bubbly cheese is the goddamn business)
Wait til casserole dish and contents are about 98° F
    (yeah, a little warmer if you like your bitches feverish)
Pour mushroom soup on your dick.
    (don't cum yet!)
Put your dick in the John Ben Pussi.
    (nice and slow you horny toad)
Hump casserole gently to start,
but you may gradually increase intensity as needed.
    (you can come now, okay?)
    (eat it you sick fuck, Eat It!)

Hint: For a more authentic European experience, try being socialist, you fucking hippy
I bet you drive a goddamn electric car. Jesus.
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